Kids & Parents: How Do I Teach My Kids to Be Friends with Peers with Disabilities?
- Boundless Team
- Jul 8
- 3 min read
You know the moment. Your child says something loud in the grocery store, at church, or on the playground about another child’s wheelchair, hearing aid, or difference, and suddenly you feel every eye in the room. Here’s the answer first: teach your kids that children with disabilities are not “other” kids to avoid or pity, but peers to know, welcome, respect, and genuinely befriend.
Practical Scenarios: Scripts for the "What Ifs"
Sometimes we don't act because we’re afraid of saying the wrong thing. Here are a few scripts you can use with your child to help them feel confident.
Scenario: Meeting someone new at Church
The Script: "Hi! I'm [Name]. I haven't seen you here before. I like your [T-shirt/shoes/cool wheelchair stickers]. Do you want to come see the LEGOs in the kids' wing?"
The Lesson: Start with a compliment and an invitation.
Scenario: Noticing someone being left out at School
The Script: "Hey, I noticed you were sitting alone. Can I sit here today? What are you reading?"
The Lesson: Proximity is the first step toward friendship.
Scenario: Your child asks a "loud" question in public
The Script (to your child): "That’s a great question! You noticed his hearing aid. It helps him hear sounds better, just like my glasses help me see."
The Script (to the other person): "I’m sorry if we were a bit loud! We’re just learning about how amazing God made everyone. I’m [Your Name], and this is [Child’s Name]. What’s your name?"
The Lesson: Don't shush: bridge. Acknowledge the curiosity and turn it into a polite introduction.
Modeling Inclusion: The Parent’s Role
Our children are world-class observers. They will do what we do far more than they will do what we say. If we want our kids to be inclusive, they need to see us:
Seeking out parents of children with disabilities. Don't let the "disability wall" keep you from making friends with other parents. They need community, too.
Using respectful language. Words matter. We use "person-first" language (e.g., "a person with autism" rather than "an autistic person") to remind ourselves and our kids that the person always comes before the diagnosis.
Asking, not assuming. When you see a family who might need an extra hand, ask. "I'm heading to the car: can I grab your diaper bag for you?" or "We’re hosting a playdate; are there any snacks or activities that work best for your son?"
5 Ways to Start Today
"My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you." — John 15:12 www.boundlessonlinechurch.org
Diversify your bookshelf. Make sure your home library includes stories featuring characters with disabilities who are the heroes of the story, not just the people being helped.
Pray specifically. In your nightly prayers, thank God for the diversity of His family. Pray for your friends at school or church by name.
Host an inclusive playdate. If you know a family with a child who has special needs, invite them over! Ask the parents ahead of time what would make the environment most comfortable.
Watch a video together. There are wonderful short films and clips that explain different disabilities in a kid-friendly way. Watch one and discuss it afterward.
Visit Boundless Online Church. If you’re looking for a community that values every member of the family, join us online. We’d love to walk this journey with you.
Teaching our kids to be friends with everyone isn't about being perfect: it's about being present. It’s about teaching them that when we open our circles, we aren't just doing something "nice." We are becoming the hands and feet of Jesus.
Connect with Us
At Boundless Online Church, we believe faith doesn't just happen on Sundays. It happens at the kitchen table, in the car, and on the playground. We’re here to support your family as you grow closer to Jesus together.
www.boundlessonlinechurch.org www.famemphis.org Need prayer right now? Text us:1-901-213-7341 24/7 AI Phone Support:+1 (901) 668-5380 Ministry Hours: CST 9–4, Monday–Friday Sunday service streaming online
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