Top 5 Ways to Support Friends Going Through a Storm
- Dr. Layne McDonald
- 4 days ago
- 5 min read
Updated: 3 days ago
Life has a way of throwing storms at us when we least expect them. A job loss, a health crisis, a broken relationship, the loss of a loved one, these moments can leave even the strongest among us feeling lost and overwhelmed. And when someone we love is walking through that kind of darkness, we often find ourselves asking: How can I really help?
Here's the beautiful truth: You don't have to have all the answers to make a difference. Sometimes, the most powerful thing you can do is simply show up.
Pastor Dr. Layne McDonald often reminds us at Boundless Online Church that we were never meant to walk through life alone. God designed us for community, for connection, and for carrying each other's burdens. As Galatians 6:2 tells us: "Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ."
Today, we're diving into the top 5 ways you can be a present, supportive friend when someone you care about is weathering a storm. These aren't complicated formulas, they're simple, heartfelt actions that can change everything.
1. Listen Without Judgment (Or Trying to Fix Everything)
When a friend is hurting, our first instinct is often to jump into problem-solving mode. We want to fix it, offer advice, and make the pain go away. But here's what most people going through a storm really need: someone who will simply listen.
Mindful listening is one of the most powerful gifts you can give. Create a safe space where your friend can express themselves without interruption. Make eye contact. Put your phone away. Let your body language say, "I'm here, and you matter."
Resist the urge to rush in with solutions. Instead, try phrases like:
"That sounds incredibly hard, thank you for trusting me with this."
"I'm so sorry you're going through this. How can I support you right now?"
"I don't have all the answers, but I'm not going anywhere."
Sometimes, your presence speaks louder than any advice ever could. Proverbs 18:13 reminds us: "To answer before listening, that is folly and shame." Be the friend who listens first.
2. Set Healthy Boundaries (It's Not Selfish, It's Necessary)
Here's something we don't talk about enough: You cannot pour from an empty cup.
Supporting a friend through a difficult season is beautiful and important, but it can also be emotionally draining. If you don't take care of yourself, you'll eventually burn out, and that helps no one.
Setting boundaries isn't about abandoning your friend. It's about sustaining your ability to support them over the long haul. Here's what that might look like:
Time boundaries: It's okay to say, "I have about 30 minutes to talk right now, let's make the most of it."
Emotional boundaries: Be honest when you're feeling overwhelmed. "I want to support you, but I also need to take care of myself so I can keep showing up for you."
Energy boundaries: You don't have to be available 24/7. Choose when and how you engage.
Remember, even Jesus took time to rest and withdraw from the crowds. You can love someone deeply while still honoring your own limits.
3. Offer Practical, Concrete Help
When life falls apart, the everyday stuff doesn't stop. The dishes still pile up. The kids still need to eat. The bills still need to be paid. And for someone in crisis, even the smallest tasks can feel like climbing a mountain.
This is where you can step in with practical, tangible support:
Drop off a home-cooked meal (or a gift card to their favorite restaurant)
Offer to run errands, groceries, pharmacy pickups, dry cleaning
Help with household chores like laundry, dishes, or yard work
Babysit so they can have time to breathe, rest, or attend appointments
Drive them to an important meeting or doctor's visit
Here's a pro tip: Instead of saying, "Let me know if you need anythig" (which puts the burden on them), try being specific: "I'm bringing dinner on Thursday, would lasagna or chicken work better?"
These small, thoughtful gestures can lift a huge weight off someone's shoulders. And they communicate something powerful: You are not alone in this.
4. Connect Them to Professional Resources
You are an amazing friend. But you're not a therapist, a counselor, or a crisis intervention specialist, and that's okay. You don't have to be their only lifeline.
Part of loving someone well is encouraging them to seek the help they need from trained professionals. This might include:
A licensed therapist or counselor
A support group for their specific situation (grief, addiction, divorce, etc.)
A crisis hotline if they're in immediate distress
Pastoral care and prayer support
You can offer to help them research options, make phone calls, or even accompany them to their first appointment. But remember: it's not your job to carry weight that requires professional expertise.
At Boundless Online Church, we have pastors, prayer teams, and support groups ready to walk alongside anyone who needs encouragement. If your friend doesn't have a church home, invite them to connect with us at www.boundlessonlinechurch.org. Our 24/7 AI Assistant is also available anytime at 1-901-668-5380.
5. Show Up Consistently, Even After the Crisis Passes
Here's something that happens all too often: friends rally around during the initial crisis, but after a few weeks, they disappear. Life gets busy. The texts slow down. The calls stop coming.
But grief and healing don't follow a neat timeline. The hardest moments often come after the funeral, after the divorce is finalized, after the initial shock wears off. That's when your friend needs you most.
Keep showing up. Here's how:
Send a simple text: "Just thinking about you today. No need to respond, just wanted you to know I care."
Mark your calendar to check in regularly, weekly, biweekly, monthly
Remember important dates (anniversaries, birthdays, milestones) and reach out
Sit with them quietly, even when there's nothing left to say
You don't need perfect words. You just need to be present. Your consistent presence reminds them of an even greater truth: God never leaves us, and neither does His family.
A Biblical Affirmation for Your Heart
As you step into this calling to support others, hold onto this life-changing truth:
"The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." : Psalm 34:18
When you show up for a friend in their darkest hour, you are the hands and feet of Jesus. You are living proof that no one is ever forgotten, never alone, and deeply loved by God.
You Were Made for Community
Pastor Dr. Layne McDonald and the entire Boundless Online Church family want you to know: you belong here. Whether you're the one supporting a friend or the one going through the storm yourself, there's a place for you in this community.
Ready to connect? Join a group, explore training opportunities, or simply reach out for prayer and encouragement. We're here for you: 24/7, 365 days a year.
👉 Join the loving community at www.boundlessonlinechurch.org
👉 Ready to connect? Join a group or start your training at www.boundlessonlinechurch.org
You are never forgotten. You are never alone. You are deeply loved.
Welcome home.
AI 24/7 Assistant: 1-901-668-5380 Boundless Phone: 1-901-213-7341 FA Memphis: 1-901-843-8600 lmcdonald@famemphis.net - www.boundlessonlinechurch.org
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